Clarity
by DaydreaminAri
Summary: "If our love is insanity why are you my clarity?" That's the sentence that started it all. A great friendship, a new love, and most importantly a new perspective on life... Love is full of questions, some that we don't know the answers to and sometimes we need a little help to see what's right in front of us. A little help to make it all clear. - CABBIE!
1. Chapter 1

The gang, some friends, and I were all sitting around Tori's coffee table trying to decide what to do. We had invited a couple of people from school over to Tori's house. Brian, Lisa, Scott, Jones, and Hannah came over. It was a Friday night and like always, we all had nothing to do. We were just throwing out ideas.

"Movie night?" Tori suggests.

"Nah… to boring." Beck answers.

"How about truth or dare?" Jade says with a smirk. Everyone looks at her.

"There is no way in hell I'm playing truth or dare with you." Brian says. Jones and Lisa agree with him. Jones was the star of the HA lacrosse team and probably one of the best looking guys in school. He and I were practically best friends, besides me and Robbie. Everyone had their eye on him, but he was a good guy and only stuck to one girl. He and Hannah were a couple. He really liked her but everyone knew Hannah was a bitch and cheated on Jones every other day. The only reason she was here, was because he was. Brian and Scott were brothers. Scott was younger by one year, but the both played on the varsity lacrosse team. Lisa was the geek but everyone liked her. She was a sweetheart.

"What about manhunt. It's dark enough." Scott says.

"I'm way too lazy to get up." Tori says.

"Yea so am I." Jade says giving everyone a look to make sure they don't say yes. Everyone nods in agreement because of Jade.

Robbie and I are sitting there quietly. I look up when I have an idea. "I have an idea…" I say quietly because I didn't think anyone would want to hear it.

Everyone continues to talk over me. It was like this every time. Robbie and I were the outcasts of the group. Robbie was the nerd with the puppet (which he got rid of by the way) and I was the ditz. They didn't really care what we thought so Robbie and I became great friend. Andre was one of the people who would try to speak up for us. He was always nice.

Jade was a good friend to me. But she was the kind who is nice and talks to you when you're alone or with people she's comfortable with. Jade likes to be the tough one. The one in control. She's scared that everyone may hate her so she makes them like her. So being nice to the ditz isn't something a mean girl would do. I get it but I just wish it wasn't like that.

I look back over at Robbie. He was that person who was always there. He was my best friend. He was nice to me 24/7. He's the only one who has never called me stupid or ditzy. And because we've spent so much time together, Robbie... Well everyone is convinced he's in love with me… It's not that I don't believe them, because I can tell he does, it's just who would like me. I'm a stupid red head. I'm not even that pretty. Plus he's never weird about it. Whenever I do anything, like make a move or ask him, he's always nice about it but he denies it, saying he doesn't want to ruin the friendship we have.

Robbie catches me staring at him while I was in my daydream. He gives me a small smile before clearing his voice.

"Guys. I think Cat has an idea." Everyone looks from Robbie to me.

I look up as he says this to see everyone staring at me. "How about spin the bottle."

Everyone bursts out into laughter until Jade and Tori stop. Slowly everyone else stops because they realize it's a pretty good idea.

"I mean, we're all teenagers. We've all kissed someone. Why don't we… explore a little. For all we know, Andre and Tori could be a couple after this game." Everyone laughs as I say that but Andre and Tori turn bright red.

"Ok… let's do it." Jade agrees.

"We need a bottle." Jones points out. Hannah didn't look too thrilled. This would mean that her boyfriend would be kissing other girls.

Tori gets up and runs over to the fridge. She pulls out a half empty ice tea glass. She starts to drink the remainder and places it down on the table when she finishes.

"We now have a bottle." Tori says triumphantly because she finished the bottle quickly. Everyone gives a short laugh.

"So. We all know how this works right? Whoever it lands on you have to kiss. If it lands on the same sex… well you still have to kiss. If it lands on you, the person to your right gets to pick who you kiss." I quickly go over the rules. Everyone agrees. Hannah looks furious and decides she wants to go first.

"Give me the bottle." She says reaching for it. I pull it away quickly.

"What's the magic word?" I say taunting her.

"Just give me the damn bottle." I hold it close to my chest. After a couple of seconds everyone is laughing hysterically, including Jones. "Fine. Give me the bottle, please." I hand her the bottle and she hits Jones in the arm for laughing at her.

She places the bottle in the middle of the coffee table and spins it hard clockwise. The bottle spins and spins and spins. Finally it stops.

Scott. One of Jones's best friends. Both Scott and Jones start to laugh. Neither one cared. They trusted each other. Scott sits up and leans over to Hannah. Their lips barely touch for 2 seconds, before Hannah pulls back quickly.

"Are we going clockwise or are we doing whoever it lands on goes next?" Scott asks.

"Let's do whoever it lands on. Makes it more interesting." Andre says. Everyone agrees.

Scott spins the bottle and it lands on Jones. Of all people.

"Ok buddy get your ass over here." Scott says. Jones gets up on his knees and leans over a couple of people to meet Scott. Their lips touch softly before Scott pulls him in roughly and sticks his tongue in Jones's mouth. Jones returns the tongue.

"Whoa… Hey Hannah are you sure you boy toy isn't playing for the opposite team?" I ask her. Everyone laughs and you can see the smiles form on Scott and Jones's face.

She gives me a glare and pulls her boyfriend back next to her. "Enough!"

"What? Was that too much…?" He asks innocently.

"Haha." She says sarcastically. "Can someone go?!"

Jones takes the bottle and spins it. Remember how I said Jones was one of the best looking guys in the school? Well the best day of my life just came… but it was still weird because he just sucked a man's face off.

"Little Kitty Cat… Ready for the best kiss of your life?" Jones smiles. He knew I thought he was gorgeous and he knew full well that I was thrilled this was happening.

"Yes. Yes I am." I flirtatiously smile back. I get up and lean over to him. I grab the side of his face and pull him towards me. Our lips crash. No spark. But the thought of kissing Jones was enough to give me butterflies. This was every girl at Hollywood Arts dream. The kiss was only about 10 seconds but Around 5 I opened my eyes to look at Hannah. He face was beat red and she looked pissed.

"Wow…" I say looking at Hannah. She glares at me and I just smile. I take the bottle in my hands and place it in the middle of the table. Everyone looks around. I spin the bottle quickly and shut my eyes. I wanted to be surprised by who it landed on. Everyone was silent as it spun.

"Oh…" I can here Jade say with a chuckle.

"Um…"

There were a few gasps too. I open my eyes and look at the bottle. It was pointed to the left of me. I look over to make sure that I was correct. And of course I was sitting next to Robbie. I look up and into his eyes. His face starts to get red.

"You ok with this?" I ask. I admit I think Robbie's kind of cute, in that nerdy way, but I never actually liked him so this would be easy.

He doesn't respond at first but finally says, "Yea. It's no big deal." A couple of people chuckle but I give them a glare.

"Well…" I say looking at him. I was on the ground and he was sitting on the couch. I slide myself up onto the couch and look at him. I lean in a little bit but not all the way. He slowly moves in the rest of the way. Where every kiss tonight was cool and calm this one was nerve racking to all of us. Our lips touch and he pushes my chin up with his knuckle. The kiss was… well it was different. There was passion behind it, there was something… I just didn't know what it was.

The kiss deepened a little bit when I grabbed the back of his head and pulled him into me. I open my mouth a little bit and let his tongue in.

"Woah…" Jade and Tori say almost simultaneously.

I quickly pull back not knowing what was happening. I can feel my face get red and hot. "Sorry." I say and slid back down onto the floor but move a little bit closer to his legs.

Jade was staring at me. I didn't dare look at her. I just wasn't ready to talk about it. I didn't even know what happened. I don't know what I felt. I was just confused.

I wasn't paying attention when Robbie spun the bottle or when he kissed the girl, but the next thing I know, the bottle was facing me. I look around to see who spun it.

Brian.

"Ok. Come here." I say pulling him towards me. I grab the back of his head and put my lips on him. Anything to get the attention off of me and Robbie. I wouldn't call this a make out session but it was a deep unmeaningful kiss. Brian was a nice guy but just not my type. I pull back to see everyone talking amongst themselves. I just couldn't take any questions right now. Not until I figure it out myself.

"Who's next?" I ask.

"You." Jade replies.

"Oh. Ok." I take the bottle and spin it. I was hoping this wouldn't happen to me tonight but seeing as though luck isn't on my side, it lands on Jade.

"This is gonna be hot…" Scott says.

Jade leans over to me and pecks me on the lips, then sits back down.

"That's it?" Scott asks.

"Yea why?" Jade says staring him down.

"Well… Jones and I practically made out and you just… kiss her."

"Well unlike you pervs, girls don't do that. And we sure as hell aren't going to help you get off on it." Jade says bluntly. Scott gets quiet and goes back to talking to Brian and Jones.

I smile and chuckle at Jade's comment. Finally I work up the nerve to look at Robbie. He was on his phone texting someone, but the look on his face made me want to cry. He looked torn apart and I knew it was all because of me. I killed the poor kid.

After a couple more hours, we all go home. Robbie was the one who drove me here and no one could bring me home. I knew it would be awkward but I can't just walk home, it's 2 in the morning, 30 degrees, and I live about 3 miles away. I look over at Robbie who was putting his phone in his pocket. He gets in the driver's side and after a second, rolls down the window.

"You coming? It's cold, you're going to freeze to death!" He gives me a smile but I could tell it was fake. I can still see the hurt in his eyes and no matter how hard he tried to cover it, it would still make me feel horrible.

"Oh. Yea. Thanks." I say opening the door and getting in the semi warm car. After a couple of minutes of driving, the heat finally fully kicks in. I unfold my arms because it was warm enough.

"So…" I say.

"What?"

"I don't know. Just trying to start a conversation." I explain.

"Oh…" He says. There was nothing to talk about. Neither one of us was going to talk about tonight. After a little bit I reach over and turn the radio on. 'Clarity' by Zedd and Foxes was on.

I start to hum along to the music and shut my eyes. Finally I softly start to sing.

_Hold still right before we crash_

_'Cause we both know how this ends_

_The clock ticks till it breaks your glass_

_And I drown in you again…_

When the chorus starts I sing a little bit louder and finally belt it.

_Cause you are the piece of me_

_I wish I didn't need_

_Chasing relentlessly_

_Still fine and I don't know why_

_If our love is tragedy_

_Why are you my remedy _

_If our love is insanity_

_Why are you my clarity…_

Robbie looks at me as I sing that part of the chorus. I don't know whether or not this is a good time for the song, but it changed something in his eyes.

**Well here's a new Cabbie story. And yes, I used the name Jones, like Jones Crow. BUT, I did not use Brian and Scott because they are Ari's back up dancers. When I was rereading this chapter I only noticed it then. Lol. Well it gets better. I can promise in the later chapters there will be some good Cabbie fluff.**

**Now… excuse me while I go watch NCIS. **

**Lol Review please!**


	2. Chapter 2

**This isn't very Cabbie filled... but still, its pretty good. Every story needs a little bit of a side story. I promise the next chapter and hopefully the one after will be very fluffy. **

I tossed and turned all night. I just couldn't fall asleep. Those 4 sentences kept coming into my head.

_If our love is tragedy_

_Why are you my remedy _

_If our love is insanity_

_Why are you my clarity…_

The words, the kiss, what if felt, why I don't know what I felt. It was all too much to take in. I was confused and that was all I knew. I just needed something to make sense.

Thank god it was a Sunday. I had one more day to think until I would have to see Robbie again. My phone starts to buzz on the nightstand next to my bed. I lean over and pick it up.

_Hey… I know it's early but can you talk? – Jones_

**_Yea sure? What's up? – Cat_**

_Can we grab a cup of coffee or something? My treat for waking you up. Not a date. I promise. – Jones _

**_Ok. Sure. Meet me at the Mocha Café in 15 minutes. – Cat _**

_Sure. Thanks. – Jones _

I get up and get dressed. I figured I would shower later. He seemed like he needed to talk soon so I don't want to hold him up. I run a brush through my hair and throw it up and a quick pony tail. I grab my phone and run down the stairs. The Mocha Café was only about 5 minutes from my house so I decided to walk.

I walk in the café to see Jones waiting for my a few feet from the counter. I walk over to him.

"Have you eaten? I was going to get some food too." He says. I shake my head no.

"Ok well get whatever you want." I nod. I don't even have to look at the menu, I already know what I want.

"Got it." I look at him.

"Already?" He chuckles.

"Yea. I come here all the time." I explain.

"Ok. What will it be?" He asks.

I tell him a caramel latté and a vegetable and cheese omelet. He chuckles.

"What?" I ask.

"Vegetables… You and vegetables. It's cute." He says. We get to the front of the line and he orders for both of us.

We get our coffees and sit down at a booth. This place was one of those family owned cafés that everyone loved. It was like an Italian restaurant set up. They had a yellowish crème color on the walls but a dark brown trim that went from the middle of the wall to the floor. There was hardwood flooring and the tables and booths were dark brown. It was gorgeous.

"So. What's up?" I ask him.

He's quiet for a second. "Hannah cheated on me."

Everyone knew she was that kind of person but Jones was the one who saw the best in people and didn't mind their flaws.

"I mean I knew it would happen. But I just thought I actually meant something to her." I sit quietly and listen to him. It was the best thing to do.

"And you know the worst part. It was with my best friend. Of all people, it was Scott." He takes a sip of his coffee and shakes his head. "And to think I trusted him…" He says quietly.

I reach over and put my hand on his. "Jones… it's her loss. I mean you're you. Your face, your eyes, you body, your personality. Everything about you… it's perfect. You can't find guys like you. You deserve better than her, better than Scott."

He smiles a little bit. "I almost had her… but of course… Almost is never enough." He chuckles. The woman brings over our food and we start to eat

"Stop thinking about her. She doesn't deserver a guy like you. You can have practically any girl you want. Everyone in the school is in love with you. You walk by or your name is mentioned and people pass out. The guys want to be you. I promise you, you'll find someone, someone who's worth your love, worth your time." He smiles as I say it. I grab his hand from across the table and hold it.

"You know Jones, I don't get it. You're smart. You're nice. You treat everyone so well. And you're freaking gorgeous. And yea, you're a good looking guy but no, I'm not in love with you. I don't know another guy who can be literally as perfect as you are. How do you do it? How can you be all of these things and not be a dick?"

"My life isn't perfect. I'm not perfect. We've all got problems, as you can see. But it's all about the way you look at life. I don't believe in stereotypes. And I refuse to be the stupid asshole jock. People are people, we're all the same in some ways and we're also different, but we shouldn't be treated differently. Black, white, gay, straight, skinny, fat, short, or tall, we're all human and we all have feelings. Just because we're a little bit different doesn't mean that we're better than everyone else. Everyone is already insecure, why make them feel worse about themselves." He explains.

"Wow." I sigh. "Can I tell you something?"

"You listened to me ramble on… of course you can." He squeezes my hand.

"I'm confused. I've got so many things going on in my head and I just don't know what to do." I say.

"Is it about the kiss?" He asks me. I nod.

"Cat… emotion is a precious thing. It makes up who we are. And love, it's full of questions. Questions that are hard to find an answers to. It's frustrating, it nerve racking. It will drive you insane. But in time you will find it. Does he make you happy?"

"Of course he does! He's my best friend." I explain.

"Then go after him. If he makes you happy, if you enjoy being around him, it's worth a shot."

"But what if I screw something up? What if I ruin everything we have now? I don't even know how I feel." I say scared.

"People are always scared of the what ifs. And they end up losing their chance. Do what you feel is right. If you think there might be something there… go for it. Take the risk." He says getting up and dropping a couple singles on the table as a tip.

I get up too and follow him. We walk outside and say our goodbyes.

"Thanks for listening." Jones says.

"Thanks for listening as well…" I say looking down at my feet.

"Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow." He says.

I don't know where it came from, the sudden urge, but I needed to feel something. I needed to see if there was anything. If it felt anything like it did with Robbie. I lean up and place my hand on the back of his head. I pull him into a long kiss. At first he seemed surprised but after a second I think he understood what I was doing. I open my mouth to let his tongue slide in. He pulls me closer to him and wraps his arms around my waist. Finally we both pull back. He looks at me to see if I say anything.

"I needed to see… I needed to see if there was anything there, anything like there was with Robbie… I'm sorry." I say looking down.

"Don't be sorry. I understand. Listen… this isn't making anything weird. I'm here for you Cat. I always have been and I'm not going to stop. Your one of my closest friends. I get what you did and I'm ok with it. But listen to me, if you felt something with him, something different than with other guys, with me, then take a chance. Life is full of risks and sometimes you need to take them, otherwise life would be boring. You need a ride?" He asks me.

"Yea… to Robbie's." I know Robbie only lives down the street from me but I didn't feel like walking in the cold again. It was the beginning of winter and California was getting really cold for some reason.

I unbuckle my seatbelt when we get there and start to get out. "Good luck. And are you going to the last game Friday night?" Jones asks me. Like I said earlier, lacrosse was the big sport in HA. Their last game was this Friday and of course I wouldn't miss seeing one of my best friends play.

"Of course. I would never miss it. I think everyone's going." I say referring to the gang.

"Cool. Do you want me to wait for you?" He asks me.

"No. I'll get a ride from him." I explain.

"Ok well if you need one, just call me. I'll turn around and pick you up." He laughs as I get out of the car.

"Thanks again. And we won't be weird now right?" I ask concerned.

"Of course not. It won't change a thing."

"Thank you." I say getting out of the car and walking up the walkway. He pulls away and I stop to watch him drive up the road. I turn around and slowly start to walk. My heart started racing when I was on the way here but it started to speed up now. It felt like my heart was about to beat out of my chest.

I walk up the steps and to the door. I slowly lift my hand and go to knock. I take a deep breath. I knock 3 times.

"On second." I can hear Robbie shout. I start to get nauseas and my heart beats harder. I can here footsteps. That was it. I darted off the porch and away from his house towards mine. I chicken out. This can wait.

"Hello?!" I hear him shout from the door as I run down the street. I finally reach my house. I fumble with the keys to get them in the door. After I unlock it I rush in and slam the door behind me. I lean against the shut door and slide down it onto my butt. The tears well up in my eyes. I bring my knees to my chest and cover my head with my hands. The tears start to fall, and they keep falling.

I get out my phone and dial Jones's number.

"Hello? Cat? Are you ok?" He says probably hearing me sob.

I sniffle a little bit and finally choke out the words. "I can't do it. Not yet. I'm scared."

I can hear a tire screech over the phone. "Are you home?" He asks.

"Yes." I cry.

"I'll be over in a minute." He says hanging up. Almost a minute later I hear him pull up and within seconds he's at the door. I open it and fall into his arms. I cry into his shoulder for a little while longer before we sit and talk.

"What happened?" He asks.

"I don't know. Once you pulled away my heart felt like it was going to come out of my chest and when I knocked on the door I almost threw up. So he said 'one second' and I ran. I ran like hell." I start to cry again. He hugs me and lets me cry into his shoulder.

"Try again. Take the risk. And try again." He says. "Don't worry… It'll be ok." He says rubbing small circles on my back. His chin was on the top of my head and I can feel it move with every word.

"Thank you." I whisper into his chest.

"Anything for a friend. A great friend." He says. Jones stays most of the day. We end up ordering pizza and watching movies all day. Around 8 o'clock he explains that he has to go.

"You better be there Friday. I don't care if you're dying… well, that's the only exception. But you better be there. I won't play if you're not."

"Oh you better play. And I promise, hell or high water, I will be there. Scouts honor." I say.

"You were never a girl scout though." He challenges.

I push him towards the door. "Get out of her." I laugh as he walks out. "I'll see you tomorrow. And thanks again Jones. You really are always there."

"I'll see you tomorrow Kitty Cat." He waves walking to his car and getting in. I stand in the door frame watching as he pulls away and drives off.

"Try again… Just try again." I say to myself when I'm back inside and that's when the idea comes to me.


	3. Chapter 3

On Thursday I explain to Jones what I'm going to do. He has an ear to ear smile as I explain. He wishes me luck and tells me, "I'll make sure he's there tomorrow night." Then gives me a hug. I kiss him on the cheek and turn to walk away.

My plan was great. As long as I don't chicken out this time, it should work out well. Robbie and I weren't as awkward as the other night. We could actually look at each other when we talked.

I bump into him after 4th period the next day. "Hey Kitty Cat." He says with his usual smile.

I run up to him and kiss him on the cheek. He looked a little bit surprised but was fine a second later. "What's up?"

"Not a lot. Are you going to the game tonight?" He asks.

"Yep. Wouldn't miss it for the world. I told Jones I would be there. He told me the only exception is if I'm dead or dying." I chuckle. Robbie gets a bit red.

"So you two are dating now?" He asks.

"What! No. Jones is only a really great friend. He has been most of my life. We grew up together." I laugh it off.

"Oh. Cool." Robbie chuckles.

"Is somebody jealous?" I ask and nudge him with my arm. I was being a little bit more flirty than usual. I had to make sure this would work I have to get back on his good side.

"What! No. Why would you think that?" He tries to cover for himself.

"Well your face got red when I explained why I wouldn't miss a game. You asked if we were dating and I saw something in your eyes. And when I told you we weren't you looked relieved." I explain myself.

"Oh… You're good." He says.

"So you were jealous?!" I shout in triumph.

"I never said that." He defends.

"Yes you did. You told me I was good. That means I'm right." I challenge.

"No that means you are good at noticing body language."

"You just don't want to lose this… Ugh men and their egos. You know I would probably be jealous if you dated some pretty girl." I say quickly.

"You what? Can you please repeat yourself? I think I'm hearing things." He looks at me.

"I said I would be jealous if you were to date a pretty girl. And you would be jealous if I were to date Jones." I retell him.

"Who says?"

"I say. And because I'm me, I win." I say mater-o-fact-ly.

"Ugh fine. You win." He raises his hands in defeat.

The bell rings. I give him a hug and kiss on the cheek before going off. "I'll see you at lunch."

I walk away and after a couple of feet I turn back to see what he's doing. He's just standing there watching me. I purposely drop the pen in my hand and slowly bend down to pick it up. When I stand up fully I pull out my phone and text Robbie a quick message.

_Quit checking me out. I saw you looking at my butt. – Cat _

I was wearing my skinny jeans and boots so… maybe I did it on purpose.

After 5th period I go to lunch during 6th. I go over to sit with the group. There is already a salad in my place. I turn to Robbie and smile.

"Is this an apology?" I ask.

"Apology? For what? I did nothing wrong." He says with a charming smile.

"You know for what."

"I am a man. It's not my fault." I sit and stare at him.

"That's a crappy excuse." I say. The entire table is looking at us with a confused look. I guess the flirtyness was a bit too much for them to understand.

Tori finally speaks up and says, "What did he do?"

"It's nothing…" I say with a smile. "I'm just screwing with him."

Robbie looked a little bit relived. I didn't know whether it was because I told him I was messing around or because I didn't tell them what happened.

"So who's going to the game tonight!?" I ask in my usual peppy tone.

"I am." Robbie says.

"I know you are." I say back.

"I know." He replies.

"Ok. Who's going to the game tonight _other than _Robbie?" I ask again.

"I can't make it." Tori says. "I have to stay home because it's my parents 20th anniversary and were having a big dinner party." I nod as she finishes.

"I hate watching sports." Jade explains picking at her food.

"Jade won't let me go." Beck answers. "I have to stay with her tonight."

"I was going to, but now that nobody else is going, I should probably stay home." Andre says.

"I'm offened." I chuckle. "You don't want to sit with me…"

"It's not that Lil Red. I just don't really like watching sports either. I'm more of a music kind of guy, as you can tell." He says pointing down at his shirt. It had a piano on is with a song in the background.

"Yea yea. I get it. Well I guess it's just you and me Robbie." I nudge him a little bit.

We all finish eating and continue the small talk. Every once and a while I would look over at Robbie with a flirtatious smile.

That night, everything was going great. I meet up with Jones right before the game started. He was on one side of the fence, separation the field and the bleachers, and I was on the other. He leaned against the fence as we talked.

It was cold out, somewhere is the 30's. I had on a dark navy blue True Religion leather jacket. It had the fuzzy stuff on the inside so it was a little warmer than most leather.

"So you ready for this?" He asks me.

"Yea I think so…" I smile at the thought of how this might go.

"Well… I hope it works."

"Yea me too." I say leaning in and giving him a kiss on the cheek. "Good luck out there." I say turning around and walking over to Robbie who is standing at the concession stand.

"Hey! The games going to start in about 5 minutes." I tell him.

"Ok cool. I'm just getting a pretzel. Do you want anything?" He asks me.

"Right about now, a cup of coffee." I chuckle pulling out a pair of black leather gloves and putting them on.

"I'll get you one." He says. "Go get some seats and I'll bring it over."

I nod. "Thanks!"

I walk over to the bleachers and sit towards the middle, so we could see the field. In a few minutes Robbie comes over and sits. He hands me a cup of coffee.

"Two creams and a sugar." He says.

"You're good." I smile. I scoot a little bit closer to him and lay my head on his shoulder.

"Yes I am." He says smiling.

The ref blows the starting whistle and the crowd starts cheer for each team. By the end of the first quarter we're up by 4 points. The other team was good they just weren't as good as HA. Lacrosse was our sport. It was what we were good at.

By half time we were up a point but the other team scored 3 times. The ref blew the whistle for half time and it was 5-3. I look over at the benches. This was when I had to do it. Jones was looking at me as the coach talked to them. He finally catches my eye and nods. I smile to let him know it was going good.

I look over at Robbie. "Hey. Can we talk?" I ask him.

"Yea sure. What's up?"

"Not here. Come with me." I say grabbing his hand. I intertwine out fingers and pull him down the bleachers. I glance over at Jones who is watching me do this with a big grin. We get to the bottom of the bleachers and I pull him off to the side and under the bleachers. We walk to the middle and climb over a couple of supports before stopping.

"Listen… The other day… I'm sorry…" I look down at my feet hoping he's going to say something.

"Cat, its fine. I get it. I had feelings for you and you… well you didn't feel the same way." He says calmly.

"Robbie I didn't know what I felt! I was confused! I came to your house the other day after I had coffee with Jones… and I was going to talk to you but I couldn't. I ran off!" I explain.

"It's fine Cat. What are we doing down here by the way?" He asks.

"I needed to figure something out." I say biting my lower lip. I put my hand on the back of his head and pull him down towards me. Our lips crash and automatically I knew. What I felt the other day was different than everything else. It was that spark. It was the fireworks everyone talked about. It was passion and love. I open my mouth the slightest bit like I did the night of spin the bottle. His tongue starts to wrestle with mine. His arms snake around my waist and he pulls me close to his body. He was warm and sweet, everything I was looking for. I didn't know exactly what I felt that night, I just knew it was different and I was scared of what it might be. But I wasn't scared not, everything was perfect. Maybe, this was what I needed. Maybe this was it; maybe he was the love of my life. We finally pull apart. He just looks down into my eyes.

"I thought so…" I say breathing slightly heavily because I was out of breath.

The phase, 'he took my breath away', I now know where it came from. Not only the kiss but being around him lately, his smile, the way we were together, it made me breathless.

He smiles a little bit. He turns me around, so my back is to him, and hugs me tightly. He leans down and whispers sweetly into my ear, "And what did you have to figure out exactly?"

A shiver runs down my spine from his breath on my neck. I turn my head to look at him and whisper, "That I'm in love with you…"

**Well i know it was a little bit shorter, but i hope that was fluffy enough for you. Lol. It was really fun writing that, the whole flirty stuff in the beginning! Ugh. Now the only reason i'm updating at 12 in the morning is because Ariana4Ever decided she wanted to spam me on twitter asking for an update. And saying no to her is pretty difficult, 1 because she will beg, and 2 because she is one of my best friends (and one of my only lol)Well, yea. So here's an update for you lol. Sorry if i'm waking anyone up lol!**

**REVIEW!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Thank you Jones…" I say giving him a hug at the end of the game.

"So I'm guessing it worked out?" He asks me.

"Yea… yea it did." I smile.

"Who was right?!" He says triumphantly.

"Shut up!" I say punching his shoulder pad. "Ow! Those are hard…"

"Well they're pads… But, who was right? I want you to admit it!"

"Fine you were right, like always." I admit.

"Ok good." He says hugging me again. "I'm happy for you Cat. I really am."

"Thank you again. " I give him one last hug before going back to Robbie.

I walk up to him and plant another on his lips. He was a little surprised at first but he definitely enjoyed it. He pulls me in and I snake my arms around his neck. Everything about _us _was perfect. Just the thought of Robbie being mine brought butterflies to my stomach. And don't even get me started about when I kiss him. It was like it was meant to be.

"So… Does this mean we're official?"

"Yes… but you know what this also means?" I ask him.

"What?"

"You're mine… forever." I say sweetly.

"I know." He says wrapping his arm around me while we walk back to his car. When we get in the car I go to turn on the radio when "Clarity" comes on.

"The other day when this song came on, after the kiss, something in your eyes changed… what was it?" I ask him remembering the moment.

He continues to look forward for a second, trying to find the words he wants to use. "I was thinking about us. About how even though you may not have liked me, we would go back to what we were eventually. As long as I had you in my life…I would be ok. And then those words… "If our love is insanity why are you my clarity"… something clicked." He says continuing to watch the road. We pull up to a red light and he finally looks over at me. I grab his hand and intertwine our fingers.

I smile a bit and finally speak when the light turns green. "Why didn't you ever make a move?" I ask suddenly.

"I couldn't ruin what we had. I wanted to, so many times, I almost did so many times, but on the off chance that you didn't feel the same way, I could have ruined everything. I wish I did earlier…" He explains and squeezes my hand a little bit.

"Thank you…"

"For what?" He asks.

"For everything… Everything you've said, everything you've done, every smile. It always made me feel better and it made me fall for you even more."

"You're welcome… Well, here we are. I'll see you tomorrow right?" He says pulling up to my house.

"You're not getting off that easy mister. My mom is working the night shift tonight... so you're mine." I say leaning over and giving him a kiss. It was soft and sweet but it had its passion.

"Oh… And what exactly did you have in mind?" He asks flirtatiously.

"Nothing like that!" I read his mind and laugh. "Maybe a little cuddling though." I tell him.

"Well I have no problem with that either." He laughs back.

I get out of the car and he meets my by the passenger side door. We walk up the walkway in front of my house as I fumble through my bag for my keys. I grab the cold medal chain with a few keys in it and stick the right one in the door.

We both walk in. "Home sweet home." I say dropping my bag next to the door. Robbie grabs my wrist and spins me around to face him. He tilts my chin up with his knuckle like he did the other night, and kisses me softly. I lean into him with my hands on his chest and kiss him back. It was our 3rd kiss tonight. I didn't want this to ever stop. The way I felt, the look in his eye, the butterflies I got, I knew it was love. I didn't want to feel anything else. He kisses down my jaw line and my neck and back up. When he gets towards my ear he whispers, "We can cuddle in a little bit." before returning to my lips. As we continued the passion got stronger. We start to stumble over towards the couch but fall halfway there. We both start to crack up simultaneously. He looks at me and lean back in for the kiss. I grab the back of his head and pull it to my lips. He lays next to me with half of his body on top of me. Things start to get a bit serious when I run my hands up his shirt. I was hesitant after that and I think he caught it. He pulls back and looks at me.

"Thank you." I say because just by the look I knew he meant we didn't have to go that far. We both get and sit down on the couch. Robbie grabs the remote and turns on the TV.

"Cuddle time?" I ask him cutely.

He smiles and simply nods. We figure out how to lay down were we both fit because I started to yawn. Finally we settle down. His arm was around me with my one arm on his chest. My leg was bent and laying over his thighs and my head was on his one shoulder. It was quite comfortable.

"So… this is nice." I say yawning again.

"You're tired. But yes, it really is." He points out.

"Well… I had a very exciting day. Plus I didn't sleep at all last night because I was freaking out about what I was going to do today." I chuckle. The TV was on but we both weren't paying any attention.

After a little while of talking Robbie finally turns off the TV. I start to doze off to the rise and fall of his chest. Right before I fall asleep I feel him lean down and kiss me on the head.

"Good night Kitty Cat." Then everything went into a dream.

That morning I woke up to the sound of a click. My eyes flutter open to see my mom sleepily come through the door and into the living room. I didn't want to move because I didn't want to wake Robbie but I didn't want to have my mom freak. She walks right by us and into the kitchen. A second later she walks back into the living room with a confused look on her face.

She speaks up when she sees my eyes are open. "You two really are cute together." I try to move my leg from the position it was in because it was right over his… never mind. Anyway if I did I would have woken him.

Mom looks down at what I'm trying to do and laughs, "Its fine sweetie. I trust you." I breathe a sigh of relief. "If you do it quick enough you can get up without disturbing him." She imforms me.

I quickly try to get up and all he does when I'm standing is breathe a little quicker but then back to normal. I walk into the kitchen next to my mom.

"So you're not mad?" I ask hopefully.

"No Cat. You're 17. I trust you. Anyway the game was last night right? So you guys got home pretty late. I can understand that. The only thing I don't understand is, I though you two weren't a thing? The position you were in was telling me something completely different." She chuckles pouring 2 cups of coffee.

"Oh… I guess I was a little nervous last night and forgot to tell you." My mom looks at me wanting me to go on. I tell her the whole spin-the-bottle-thing and how I kissed Jones twice. She chuckled at that. "Jones… mom he's just such a great friend and he understood. Then he told me that if I felt anything with Robbie, I should take the risk and try. So last night I set this whole thing up. Robbie and I went to the game together and at halftime I pulled him under the bleachers and told him I needed to figure something out. Then I kissed him. We came here after and crashed on the couch."

My mom looked a little shocked. "You kissed him. You!" I was kind of shy in my mom's mind. She never really saw me with Robbie though. At that moment Robbie walked in.

"Yes mom. I kissed him. Me. Right?" I say turning to him.

He nodded still a little bit groggy. I grab his face and pull him in for a soft passionate kiss. When I pull back I look at my mom.

"See." I say bluntly. Her jaw was literally on the floor. Robbie then excuses himself and walks to the bathroom.

"Wow… You really like him… I remember when your father and I kissed each other like that… We were in love…" She smiles at the thought of him. It's been 6 years since he died and I know she misses him more and more every day.

"Mom… I think I'm in love with him…" I say quietly.

All she does is smile, "I know you are… I've never seen you look at anyone but him like that. I knew you were from the start."

I walk over to my mom and give her a hug. She was the best friend I could ever have. Jones was amazing but he wasn't my mom. She was there from the start, literally. Jones was a very close second though.

"Thanks mom." I say quietly.

**GUYS! LESS THAN 1 HOUR UNTIL YOURS TRULY!**

**AND I DIDN'T KILL CAT'S MOM! Today is a very good day lol. Well yet again, here you go Ariana4Ever. Lol Hope you all like it! **

**REVIEW AND THEM FREAK OUT BECAUSE YOURS TRULY COMES OUT IN LESS THAN ONE HOUR!**


	5. Chapter 5

The next 9 months were the most amazing moments of my life. Jones and I got closer and Robbie and I… we were head over heels for each other.

"So how are you and Robbie doing?" Jones asks me one day.

"We're doing pretty well. It's just… there's a lot up in the air right now…" I partially explain.

"What do you mean?" Jones asks me.

"We start junior year in 2 weeks... This is where reality starts to set in. The people you grew up with are going to leave. We're all going to go to college. Yea, we may have another couple years for a last hoorah, but we all know what is going to happen after that. Our best friends are going to leave. The people we care about we may never see again. And I think that's bothering Robbie." I explain.

"How do you feel about it?" He questions.

"I knew from the beginning it was going to happen. It's just how life goes. We meet people, we become great friends, then they leave and we're heartbroken. But soon enough we get over it and we meet new people. They aren't as good as the first but they help us move on. Then they leave too. And it hurts even more because it reminds us that in the end that we're all alone." I sigh.

"Ok…? Not doing too well with that… So you need to get out and have some fun. Got it… What do you want to do?" He asks me with a chuckle.

"I want this weirdness between Robbie and I to stop." I explain.

"Then you need to talk to him. Relationships are all about communication." He tells me.

I just say quiet and look out the back door window. It was gorgeous out about 80 degrees and 0% humidity. It was bright and sunny and just perfect.

"Why don't we go out to the pool?"He was referring to my in ground pool in the back yard. It was shaped like a squished oval in the center.

"You don't have your suit." I say.

"Yea I do. Remember I left it here a last month? You said you were going to keep it here in one of your drawers."

"Oh yea… Ok… sure." I say.

"Why are you so down? Come on, cheer up?" He says going to reach for my head. I grab his hand before he can touch me.

"Stop!" I yell at him.

"I was just going to ruffle your hair… sometimes it makes you smile…" He slowly moves his hand away.

I look down at me feet. "Sorry…"

"You need to get out and have some fun… I've got a buddy who can hook us up with some fake ID's. You and I… we're going to NightLife tonight. Go start getting ready."

"But—" I start.

He cuts me off. "No buts."

"Fine." I say walking up the stairs to get in the shower.

"Yea I thought so!" Jones shouts up the stairs at me.

The music was booming. I could hear it from a block away. We ended up parking about a block away because the club and something next store were the most popular places around here. Jones and I get out of the car and I quickly fix my hair before we're on our way.

"So your name is the same, Caterina Valentine. Your 22. Ok?" He says.

"Yep. Got it. Let's go."

"Are you going to say anything longer than 2 words tonight?" He asks sarcastically.

"Maybe after I've had a couple drinks…" I give a small smile.

"Hey… What's that I see? Is that a smile?!" He ruffles my hair.

I smile more as he does that. He was right, it does make me smile. "Maybe…"

"That's what I like to see. I love it when you smile." Jones looks down at his feet. "Sorry…"

"Well if it's any consolation… I like it when you smile too… but in a best friend way." I chuckle.

"I need to be honest about something Cat. My entire life, ever since I've know you, I've liked you. And I promise I'm not going to be selfish. You and Robbie… you two belong together and I'm not going to get in the way. I just needed to get that off my chest."

"Well thanks for being honest." I smile showing him it's not that big of a deal. A lot of people have liked me and I trust that he won't make a move. "But… why?"

We start to walk towards the club as he explains. "You're beautiful. You're kind. You're true. You don't care what people think about you. You won't change for anyone. You're you and your amazing. Robbie is one hell of a guy and frankly… he;s the only person I know who deserves someone like you." He smiles sticks his hands in his pockets and looks at his feet.

"Don't get nervous. Jones you my best friend. I trust you. Let's just have some fun tonight and we'll talk more about this tomorrow." I say as we walk up to the short line.

We finally get up to the front of the line and the bouncer looks at us. "ID's please."

"Yea sure." I grab mine out of my bag and Jones pulls out his wallet. The bouncer looks them over. He nods.

"You look young…"

"Yea I get that a lot. But hey by the time I'm 30 that will be a complement." I chuckle and the bouncer smiles.

"Ok go on in." He says opening the rope.

Jones and I put our IDs back and go in. The music was booming and I could feel my heart pound to the rhythm. Everything inside was light up electric blue. There were black lights that made your cloths look blue and purple. People were carrying around drinks that glowed red, blue, green, and purple. Everything was colorful.

"So you want to go get a drink?" He shouts to me but I could hardly hear him over the music.

"Sure." I say loudly. He nods and grabs my hand. We start to push through the crowd. We finally get to the back of the club which has an open door leading out to the patio. We walk through the door and towards the bar. I wasn't as loud out here. It was nice. The patio was walled off but with an open top and the breeze was coming through. The bar was in the middle. It was a large rectangle with stools surrounding it.

"So what do I get?" I ask him. I've never been to a club.

"Well definitely not iced tea."

"Why not iced tea?" I ask him.

"Because they'll give you a Long Island Iced Tea… That's vodka, tequilla, rum, gin, triple sec and coke. There's also a Blue Long island which is the same thing but instead of the coke and triple sec they put in Curacao and Sweet and Sour mix. Those will knock you on your ass!" He chuckles.

"Oh. Then what should I get?"

"Kamikaze or a Gin and Tonic. If you like mint, go for a Mimosa." He explains.

"Should I be scared you know all of this? And I assume were taking a cab home?" He smiles when I say this.

"No. And yes, I'm not driving, not even after one drink, not after what happened with your Dad." I have a quick flashback to the day after my dad died. There was an article I the news paper about it. He was hit head on by a drunk driver. I remember reading part of the article before my mom saw and took it away from me. She said that I didn't need to read that, and that it would make me sad. I knew what had happened. Jones was the one to comfort me when it happened and we both swore we wouldn't drink and drive.

"Yea…" I say as the bartender walks over to us.

"What could I get you?" The woman asks.

"Jack and Coke." Jones says raising his hand a little bit.

"Iced Tea." I say bluntly. I was too depressed lately… I needed something to get me going.

"Are you sure about that miss?" The woman asks me.

"Yea. I'll be fine." I say with a chuckle. The woman nods and smiles.

Jones looks over at me with a confused look on his face. "I've been too down lately. I need to pipe up a bit… have some fun. And if getting drunk off my ass is how I have to do it, then I will."

"Well getting drunk off your ass isn't the only way to do it… I mean there are many… MANY other ways. I mean coming here should be enough. Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes!" I say trying to get him to stand down.

"Ok fine." Jones says smiling and shaking his head. "You're going to regret it in the morning."

"As will you." I say back.

The woman brings over the drinks. "Take a sip." Jones tells me.

I grab the glass which was filled to the brim with a strong blue liquid with glowing blue ice cubes. "Why's it blue?"

"The Curacao is blue. It makes it blue. Take a sip." He says laughing.

"You take a sip." I say kind of scared.

"Ok fine." He takes the drink and takes a normal sizes sip. After he swallows it I can see the burn it sends down your throat, on his face. "That's strong…Your turn." He says swallowing again.

"Ok…" I take the drink from him and take a small sip. A burning sensation runs down my throat as I swallow it but after the 3rd sip it starts to get easier.

"So…?" He asks.

"It's good. Really good… just really strong too…" I chuckle.

"Well by the time you finish that… I'll get to see the drunk Cat." He laughs taking a sip of his drink.

"One drink won't kill me."

"On Blue Long Island will." He says finishing his drink.

After about 7 minutes I'm down to my last sip. The ditzness starts and I start to get very giggly.

"You want to go dance?" Jones looks at me.

"Why are you asking me all the questions?" I smile a little bit.

"Because tonight is your night." He says taking my hand again and pulling my back into the booming music.

We walk over on to the dance floor. We dance in silence for a little bit before we talk.

"You're pretty good at this!" I giggle flirtatiously.

"Thanks? I guess you are too." I continue to laugh a little bit.

After about 10 more minutes of dancing and random talking I stop and pull Jones off the dance floor. He looks at me waiting for me to talk. "I want another drink. Come on." I say pulling him back to the bar.

"Another… you're drunk." He says.

"Nope. Just a little buzzed." I giggle a little bit more. "Let's go!" I drag him all the way to the bar and make him sit down.

"What'll it be?" There was a new bar tender. This time it was a guy. He looked to be about 25 and gorgeous.

"Hello gorgeous…" I say under my breath. Jones looks over at me and chuckles.

"Let's get her a—" I interrupt him.

"Shots!" I say. The bartender laughs and looks at Jones.

"Whatever the woman wants." Jones says.

"Tequila. Don't care what kind. Just tequila." I giggle at the word.

The bartender turns around and walks to the alcohol. I turn to Jones. "Tequila… that's funny." He says.

"I know right! It's fun to say." Jones starts cracking up.

"What's so funny?" I ask laughing with him.

"You are DRUNK!" He cries.

"No I already told you… I am buzzed. When I start slurring my words and getting dizzy… then I'm drunk." I explain.

"Oh… my bad…" He laughs more.

The bartender brings two shot glasses and a bottle of tequila. He pours the yellowish brown liquid into the shot glasses and nods. I grab mine and Jones takes his.

"You ready?" I ask him. He nods.

"So what… are we racing?" He laughs.

"No…" I say confused.

"Go." He says and we both nock them back.

"Again." I say bluntly.

"You're lucky I'm paying." He chuckles flagging over the bartender.

"You're paying… What a gentlemen…" I laugh.

"You're so giggly… It's cute…" He says as we both nock back the second shot.

After about 3 more hours of drinking and dancing we call it a night. We walk out the door and stand on the side of the street.

"Thanks! That was a blassst." I giggle at the last word.

"Now your drunk." He states.

"Yes. Yes I am..." I burst into laughter.

Jones stares at me laughing because we both were drunk and we both knew it. "Why do you have to be such a good guy… I mean for god sake you love me but you won't make a move! Most guys would die doing that but you… you're just you… your perfect in every way…"I say stepping closer to him.

"Cat… your drunk… You don't really feel this… you're with Robbie, remember?" He says to me but never moves back. He had the chance to stop this but he didn't.

"Do you really care? Nobody we know is here… Who's looking…?" I say stepping closer and closer until we're inches away from each other. "You know you want to…"

"Cat..." He says before I cut him off by grabbing his head and pulling him in for a kiss. His lips were warm and I could feel his anxiety. He went with it for a good few second before realizing what was really happening. He pulls back quickly.

"Cat! You're drunk… it's not going to happen." He says. The tears well up in my eyes. One falls down my cheek.

"Why? Am I not good enough for you?!" I cry.

"No… Cat, you're perfect. But we can't do this. Just the other day you told me you were in love with Robbie. Now you kissed me. I know what's going on. You're upset. You're confused. But this isn't the way to fix it. Getting drunk and being reckless by kissing me and flirting with a bartender… that's not how you fix it. You talk to him. I'm here for you Cat. No matter what. And I'm not going anywhere… But you can't do this. No matter how much it hurts… you're his, not mine. I had my chance. Promise me that in the morning you're going to talk to him. You're going to tell him what happened tonight…"

I look down at the ground knowing I screwed up. "Ok… I'm sorry."

"Yea I know you are…" He says wrapping his arms around me and hugging me.

Once we're in the cab I pull out my phone and text Robbie.

_We need to talk in the morning… I screwed up and I need to talk to you. –Cat _

I never got a response.

**I had to do a lot of research for this chapter… and by research I mean call my dad into my room and ask him what's in that? And what's in that?**

**Only at the end did he look at me and say, "Wait why are you asking me this?"**

**Well yea… looks like taking that Blue Long Island was a bad idea for Cat… She is quiet a fun drunk… At least for Jones she is.**

**Well Review… and yes you can yell at me for doing that… but all stories need a conflict. So Review-away!**

**And don't EVER drink and drive… even if it means calling your parents to come pick you up. Getting in trouble is so much better than taking a life.**


	6. Chapter 6

That morning I woke up with probably one of the worst headaches I have ever had. All I remember is vomiting 3 times last night in the front yard with Jones next to me and of course… the kiss…

I can't believe I did that! What was I thinking! I'm in love with Robbie! I pick up my phone to see if Robbie ever answered. It was about 11 o'clock and I had one missed call and 3 text messages.

One was from Jones. It said

_Remember to talk to Robbie. You promised me._

And the other two were from Robbie.

_Hey. Sorry I didn't answer I fell asleep. Yea but you can come over. Whats wrong? –Robbie _

_Hey when are you coming? –Robbie _

_Hey Rob. I'm coming over now. We'll talk then. –Cat _

I don't even bother dressing up… its Robbie. I want nervous though. Yet again… he was Robbie. He was forgiving.

I pull up in front of his house a few minutes later. He is sitting outside on the porch in one of the chairs. I walk up and take a seat next to him. I don't look up from my feet.

"I'm sorry…" I start.

"For what? You didn't do anything wrong." He smiles looking over at me.

"I kissed Jones…We went out last night. I was depressed because all of this, us, it was getting weird. And I thought that maybe it might end soon… I was scared and upset. We went out to the club and I drank way too much… And I kissed him. He pushed me off of him with in a second and told me that no matter how much he liked me, I was yours… But I still kissed him…" I say finally looking up.

Robbie didn't respond but the look on his face was enough. It was hurt and betrayal. And I was the one who caused that.

"Whatever you decide to do… I understand… but please know I never meant to hurt you… and that I love you…" I say standing up.

"Why?" I stop as he asks. "Why did you do it?"

"I was drunk… really drunk… And I don't know why I was… especially with my past and alcohol. And after it happened I realized what I just did. And whether or not you forgive me… I'm never going to forgive myself for what I did to you…"

"Oh… I forgive you… I do… I've been drunk before… and I've made mistakes… I forgive you…" He says standing up and hugging me. I pull away.

"Maybe we should just end it here… I mean, we both where this is going to go. Junior year starts in 2 weeks and this is where reality starts to set in. You can't tell me it hasn't been brothering you too… I've seen the way you've been acting… around me, around other people. Maybe if we just end it here, if we just get it over with now, it'll hurt a little bit less. Maybe we'll get over it and move on sooner… I can't deal with this anymore. The constant scare that you're going to end it today or tomorrow… I thought about this most of the night. My head is telling me that it's over and my heart is telling me to keep going… but I know that somewhere in my heart the truth is there… maybe we just weren't meant to be…" I say turning around and walking away.

"You know what Cat… I think your right… Let's just end it now. Get it over with. Everything that we have ever had. The sooner we move on the better. And maybe after college, if it was meant to be… we'll be together again… but if not… this is for the better. Just know that I truly did love you… And I always will…" I can still see the hurt in his eyes and I can't take it knowing that I was the one who caused it.

I turn and run over to my car. The tears are welling up in my eyes but I refuse to cry… not until I get home… I wipe away the one tear that fell out and pull away.

As soon as I get to my house I see a car in the driveway… one that looks extremely familiar. I get out and sitting on my porch is Jones. He looks up from his folded hands that are in his lap and at me.

I walk up the steps as he stands up. "How'd it g—" I fall into his arms sobbing before he can finish his sentence.

"Oh…" He pulls me in close. The smell of him always comforted me. It was a cologne he wore… there was something about it… something that just made me feel safe… feel better.

"Hey… it's going to be ok, kid… I'm sorry… I'm really sorry…"

And that's how we sat for the next 3 hours.

"Thank you…" I eventually say into his shoulder.

"For what?"

"For everything Jones… for everything…" I say as a tear falls from my eye again.

"You're welcome…" He says rubbing tiny circles on my back. It just seemed like he knew how to make me feel better… how to make me smile… He always has. He was always the strong one.

I look up at him. "You know what today is?" I ask him only realizing myself. I shouldn't be the one crying… he shouldn't be making me feel better… it should be the other way around.

"Yea…" He says softly. Jones's father had died 12 years ago today.

"I'm sorry…" I squeeze his hand.

He just shakes his head and sighs before a tear falls down his cheek. He looks up trying to get the tears to subside but it didn't work.

"9:03... Why didn't they evacuate the south tower? They had almost 15 minutes I between… they could have done it…"

"He had gotten home late the night before… after I went to bed… He went out for a beer with his co-workers… I never got to say goodbye. He told me that that weekend he would go to the ball field with me and help with some grounders… you know, because I was having trouble with them… he promised me… But it never happened. I never told him I loved him that day…" He finishes and wipes the tears away from his eyes. I take his hand in mine and give it a squeeze.

"He knows… he always has…" I say giving him half of a hug. "Hey… I have an idea…"

I let go of his hand and start to walk away. I stop him from following me and go to my garage doors. I put in the code to open it and duck under the doors. I come back out with two mitts and a baseball. I throw one at him and he catches it. He looks up from the glove and right into my eyes. I can see his blue eyes get brighter as the white around them get red and watery.

I walk about 15 yards away from him and turn to see him. He was looking down at the glove. Just staring. Finally he looks back up at me and waits for me to say something.

"Let's play catch…" I say with a smile. No matter how much I hurt he was always strong for me, now it's my time to be strong for him. Only twice in my life have I seen Jones cry… the day his father died and right now… The tears streamed down his face as I throw the ball at his. The smack of the mitt lets me know that he catches it.

He throws it back and I catch it too. I look up and am about to throw it when he shuts his eyes and says, "Thank you…"

**12 years ago today everything changed. A plane crashes into the North Tower of the World Trade Center then a plane crashes into the South Tower. A plane flies into the Pentagon and one is crash landed in a field outside of Pittsburg. And that was it… That was the end of everything being "normal". It's been 12 years and things aren't back to normal and they won't be for a very long time. **

**Well hopefully I got some tears out of y'all. Review away. I know it was shorter but I had field hockey today in 99 degree weather and I had like 45 lbs of padding on and I am EXHAUSTED! Well review please!**

**FDNY**

**NYPD**

**Never Forget 9/11**


	7. Chapter 7

What I did yesterday for Jones made me feel better. It put a smile on my face. But the second I remembered what happened with me and Robbie, I broke down. I didn't sleep a wink last night either. I finally fell asleep around 5 in the morning and I guess I woke up around 11 o'clock. I walk out of my bedroom to the smell of bacon, eggs and pancakes. The best breakfast you could ever have.

I walk down the stairs to see my mom standing at the stove finishing the pancakes. Jones was sitting on the stool behind the island with a cup of coffee. He turns when I get to the bottom of the stairs.

"Good morning sunshine. You're up early." He says sarcastically with a chuckle.

"I don't wanna hear about it." I say rudely walking over and getting a cup of coffee. I slip my hand through the handle and walk over to the stool next to him. I take a seat and start to drink my coffee.

"I made you your favorite breakfast! I even went out and bought some ice cream, if you want some later." My mom says cheery.

"Why are you trying to cheer me up? It's obviously not going to work!" I freak on them. They both stay quiet and my mom brings me over a plate with 2 pancakes, 2 pieces of bacon, and some scrambled eggs.

"Can I have a slice of cheese and some ketchup?" I ask my mom. She just stares at me.

"Why do you like that? Ugh… it's gross." She says throwing the cheese on the island with the ketchup as I pile everything on one pancake and put some ketchup on it. After everything is on it, I put the second pancake on it and eat it as a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich.

"Because I like it ok?!" I rudely say.

"Listen honey… I know you're hurt but you can't just be depressed forever! You've got to move on. It's his loss, not yours…"

"Number one, I'm the one who broke it off not him. And number two, whether or not it's his loss… I just left the love of my life…" I say as the tears rush down my face.

My mom walks over to the counter. "I don't know if this is a good time… but this came in the mail today… it's for you."

I look over at her and give her a glare because this was the complete wrong time, but I wipe my eyes and grab the envelope anyway. I rip the side of the envelope off and slide the folded piece of paper out. It was a piece of printer paper the size of a post-it note. On it was typed:

_Go to the park. Walk down the path to the big oak tree with the bench under it._

"What the hell is this mom. I'm not in the mood for this crap." I say showing her the paper. "Stop trying to get me to smile! It's not going to work anytime soon!" I say as she reads it.

I say crumpling up the paper and throwing it on the floor. "I didn't send that. I swear. It doesn't even have a name on the envelope. Maybe you should do what it says."

I look at Jones ad give him a mean glare. "Hey. Don't look at me! I didn't do it either!" He raises his hands defensively.

"I swear I'm going to kill someone for this." I say picking up the crumpled paper and going to get dressed.

"Make sure you brush your hair… it's a rat's nest…" Jones shouts up at me.

"Go to hell." I say bluntly back.

I can hear them laughing down stairs. I didn't know what it was about so I didn't freak out. They were too quiet for me to make out anything they were saying. I run a brush through my hair and get out all of the knots and throw on some presentable cloths. I walk back down the stairs about 10 minutes later.

"Ah… you look much better." Jones says smiling at me. He reaches out for my head when I grab his arm tightly.

"JUST STOP!" I yell at him gripping his wrist to the point where he winces. I finally realize that they are just trying to help and I let go.

"I'm sorry…" I say quietly looking down, grabbing my keys and walking out the door quickly. I run down to my car and see a rose on the front of the car.

"I'm gonna kill Jones… I'm gonna kill him…" I say to myself taking the rose off the hood and getting in the car. I throw the rose and the note into the passenger seat. I start the car and back out of the drive way. After about 5 minutes I pull up to the park. I pull into a spot closest to the big oak tree. I get out and walk over to the tree. There was nothing there…

"I knew it…This is bullshit…" I say walking around the tree to make sure there was nothing.

I go to walk to my car when I stop and take a second glance at the bench. On it is another piece of paper taped to the back rest of the bench and under it is another red rose. I pick up the rose and a little bit of a smile comes across my face.

On the paper it said:

_Now go to the movie theater._

That's the next place I go. I walk into the theater and on one of the benches there is a single red rose like before. Above it is another not just like at the park. I walk over and pick both of them up. The biggest smile comes over my face as I read. The note reads:

_That's the smile I like to see. Now go to the barber shop on 32nd Street. Take the roses._

I take the note and go back to my car. I put the rose with the other note and rose. I start the engine again and pull out of my spot. I drive halfway downtown until I reach 32nd Street. I pull into one of the spots. I get out, take the roses with me and walk into the shop. There are 4 guys getting hair cuts at I go in. I walk over to the front area and look for someone who works here. And older man comes out and looks at me.

"Come with me please." He says taking my hand. He guilds me over to a seat. I sit in the comfortable leather. "Sit here." He says leaving me and going into the back of the shop. The men who are taking care of the guys getting their hair cut do a quick sweep of the floors and leave. The 4 men spin their chairs around before making do-do-do-do sounds in different octaves, like a barber shop quartet. The man to the right stands up as the others are creating a melody.

"Cat Valentine?" He asks me with his hands behind his back. I simply nod in astonishment. "We're Vocal Spectrum."

He starts sing, still with his hands behind his back.

**_It's not easy_**

**_To find someone who cares_**

**_It's not easy _**

**_To find magic in pairs_**

**_I found her, I love her_**

**_And I won't let her get away_**

**_Cuz it's not easy_**

The man that talked to me walks over and gets on one knee. He hands me a rose while he continues to sing.

**_It's weird that friends can be different_**

**_Yes I understand you now_**

One of the other men does a back flip over to me and hands me a second rose.

**_It's not easy_**

**_To find someone who cares_**

**_It's not easy _**

**_To find magic in pairs_**

**_Now that I have her, hold her_**

**_Treasure her from day to day (From day to day)_**

**_It's so easy_**

**_It's not easy_**

**_To share somebody's dream_**

**_It gets easy_**

One of the men with a lower voice comes and sits next to me. He puts his arm around me and offers me the third rose. I start to blush and except it.

**_When you work as a team_**

**_You've got to tend it, fan it_**

**_That's what I plan to do_**

**_Oh I had one friend_**

**_Bye my side_**

**_But now I have you…_**

**_It's so easy…_**

Finally the last man spins, does a cartwheel, then a front flip and land right in front of me. He hands me the fourth rose and a small piece of paper with a charming smile. I sit there completely in shock.

The men go running to the back of the shop as 4 other men come out. "We're OC Times." They start the do-do-do-do stuff.

**_With the beat, beat, beat of my heart beats_**

**_And the bang, bang, bang of my brain_**

**_Got a girl that's driving me crazy_**

**_And I think I'm gonna go insane_**

One of the men does a back hand spring across the floor while the others sing. These people were absolutely amazing. This man hands me a rose too.

**_You think loves a fool's game_**

**_Well buddy maybe your right_**

**_Got a girl that's driving me crazy_**

**_And I think I'm gonna see her tonight_**

Another man walks over to me, hands me the rose and directly starts singing to me. Now I have 9 total.

**_Cuz it's the blue eyes_**

**_And all the goody charms_**

**_And now tonight's the night_**

**_She's in my arms (Yes in my arms)_**

The third man like in the other group comes over and pulls me to my feet. He spins me around and dances with me for a minute before letting me sit and watch again. He then gives me the 10th rose.

**_One day you'll find a girl_**

**_And then you'll understand_**

**_That a girl can drive men crazy_**

**_And she'll have you in the palm of her hand_**

The 4th man walks over to me calmly and hand me the 11th rose. He sits next to me and the other men come over. The sit on the leather couch, 2 on each side of me, and continue to sing.

**_With the beat, beat, beat of my heart beats_**

**_And the bang, bang, bang of my brain_**

**_Got a girl that's driving me crazy_**

**_And I think I'm gonna go insane_**

**_Cuz it's the blue eyes_**

**_And all the goody charms_**

**_And now tonight's the night_**

**_She's in my arms (Yes in my arms)_**

With that they point over to the door that everyone went though and out walks Robbie with a rose in one hand.

"There is no way in hell I'm ever going to let you go… Are you insane…?" He says reaching for my hand. Pulling me up and close to him. We sway back and forth to the men singing.

**_Cuz it's the blue eyes_**

**_And all the goody charms_**

**_And now tonight's the night_**

**_She's in my arms (Yes in my arms)_**

"Yes… she's in my arms…" He saws pulling me in for a kiss. It was long and drawn out. There was more passion behind it than I have ever felt. Everything was perfect at the moment. Nothing could go wrong. Nothing at all. Out lips move in simultaneous movements. Finally he opens his mouth a little bit and lets my tongue slip in. I snake my arms around his neck and pull him as close to me as possible. I inch up closer to his face on to my tippy toes.

"You have to be the most amazing, charming, sweet man I have ever known…"

**One last chap... REVIEW**


	8. Chapter 8

Everything after that day was amazing. Everything was perfect. We fought, like every couple did, but it never ended. We always stayed strong.

And it was only 8 years later that I fully realized, that if I had never met s certain someone… Robbie and I would never be…

So let's go back a little bit, back to our wedding day, 8 years after it all started.

"I Do" Robbie finally says. And that was the start of the rest of our lives together.

"And do you Caterina Valentine take Robert Shapiro as your lawfully wedded husband?" The priest asks.

"Hell yes..." I say and the priest chuckles.

"You may now kiss the bride." The priest says smiling as Robbie pulls me in for a long drawn out kiss. Everyone was clapping and saying 'aww'. This was the best day of my life.

After all of the congratulations we go off to the reception. There was some small talk, and some talk about later plan with Robbie but mostly a lot of laughs.

Jones steps up and takes a mic' from the DJ. He taps it to make sure it's working and then starts to speak. "Hi… My name's Jones, for all of you who don't know me, I was the boy next-door growing up with Cat. I eventually moved around 6, the year after my dad died. We stayed in town, we just had to get out of that house, you know. Cat was there for me… 24/7. And I owe her for a hell of a lot. 9 years ago, we were in sophomore year … I was the star of the lacrosse team, and Cat's best friend. One day, I don't really remember why, but we all went over to Tori's house. That was the day everything started between Cat and Robbie. Just a simple kiss because of spin the bottle… I remember her coming to me, confused and in tears because she didn't want to screw everything up with their friendship. And I told her, that if there was something there, it was worth the risk. So she came up with this plan to pull him under the bleachers at halftime on the last lacrosse game. She told him she needed to 'figure something out'… and then she kissed him. A year later, they broke up. But Robbie being the amazing he is, got her back. These two… they're unstoppable. Nothing can break them apart. So… I'll raise my glass to these two spending forever together, because I've never see such a perfect pair." He finishes and raises his glass with everyone else. He looks over and gives me a smile. I get up and take the mic from him.

"I think I have you beat on speak Jones…" Everyone laughs.

"Life is complicated. It's confusing. It's hard. And sometimes, you just want to give up. When you feel like this, there is nothing stopping you. I was confused. My life was complicated. And I did want to give up so many times. But there was always that one person there for me." Robbie chuckles knowing full well it wasn't him, even though he was always there.

"Jones was that person. And I know that this night should just be about me and Robbie, but I think he deserves a little bit of acknowledgement. He was the friend that always had the crush on me, but thought I deserved better. And when Robbie came around, he wasn't jealous. He told me that I deserved Robbie and he wasn't going to be the one to get in the way. Any man, who will put aside his feeling and what he wants for the good of another, is a great person. But only did I realize the other day, if it wasn't for him… Robbie and I wouldn't be together. I didn't want to screw anything up. I wasn't sure how I felt in the beginning. I felt something, but I didn't have anything to compare it to… Jones was the person who made everything make sense. And I have to thank him for that… Sometimes it takes a certain person to help you see what's right in front of you… To help you see things a little bit more clearly… Someone who is your clarity…" The tears well up in my eyes.

"I couldn't ask for a better friend…" I finish and let only a single tear fall out.

Robbie and I went out of to the dance floor while everyone stood around and watched. This was the dance I had been waiting for my entire life. I wrap my arms around his neck and lay my head on his shoulder as we sway back and worth to the music. I hummed along to my favorite song… my wedding song… our song…

_You don't need a lot of money_

_Honey, you don't have to play no games_

_All I need is all you're loving_

_To get the blood rushing through my veins_

_I wanna say we're going steady_

_Like its 1954, no, it doesn't have to be forever_

_Just as long as I'm the name on your_

_Tattooed heart... (tattooed heart)_

_You don't need to worry about making me crazy_

_'Cause I'm way past that_

_And so just call me, if you want me_

_'Cause you got me, and I'll show you how much I want to be_

_On your tattooed heart_

_Tattooed heart, tattooed heart_

_Just as long as I'm the name on your tattooed heart_

_Wrap me in your jacket, my baby_

_And lay me in your bed_

_And kiss me underneath the moonlight_

_Darling let me trace the lines on your tattooed heart_

_Just as long as I'm the name on your tattooed heart_

And that's my story… Robbie and I are 78 years old… and we had the best 60 years a couple could have… and hopefully we'll have a couple more…

About a year after we got married I gave birth to a baby boy. I named him Jones. He had these beautiful blues eyes and light brown hair. He grew up to be a very handsome, smart man… and I am very proud to call him my son. He married a woman named Christina and they had a little girl, Liz.

Jones died of Pancreatic cancer when he was 47. He was having a lot of pain in his upper abdomen and he was getting really nauseas. He though he just had the flu or something until he started dropping weight dramatically. I told him he needed to go see a doctor and when I took him, the doctor told him he would have to go for further testing. Later that month he was diagnoses with Pancreatic cancer. He started chemotherapy about a week later but it didn't work. The cancer got to his Lymphatic system and spread though out his body and finally two years later it got to his brain. That was probably the hardest loss I have ever had to go though.

Jones was my best friend and the reason I found the love of my life. He was selfless, he never got jealous of me and Robbie, and even until his last breath, he was there for me. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have him as a friend.

Robbie and I were closer than ever after his death. Robbie comforted me. He knew that I loved him and that he was the greatest thing in my life, but there was always going to be something missing in me now. He understood me, he loved, and he tried his hardest to make me happy all the time. He is an amazing man and I will love him forever. Even if forever is only a few more years, the forever that we have spent together already is good enough for me…

**The end**

**And that's a wrap lol. I don't know why I always do that but whatever. Well I figured I always kill someone in my stories so why not in this one too. Jones was my favorite character in this story… there is just something friendship that is a little bit more important than everything else. Yes, love is one hell of an amazing thing but if we didn't have friendship, we'd be alone forever. Jones is kind of that ideal friend the one everyone wants. I based him off of one of my friends but of course I changes a little bit. He's a guy; she's a girl, the whole crush thing, ect. But if you're ever lucky enough to have a friend like him, don't ever let them slip away. **

**Thanks again to all of my readers! I love you guys so much! You're the only reason I write. To be honest 2 years I remember writing my own little stories in note books and hiding them from the world. Then I started writing them on my computer but I hid them in these really hidden files. Only this year did Ariana4Ever get me to write one. And if you remember I said that "I get it if you hate it because I can't write." Well I guess I was wrong. Thank you for the amazing review and the awesome comments. I love it how some of you literally yell at me when I do something you don't like. That always gives me a laugh. I have gotten many "I HATE YOU"s on twitter from a few people. It cracks me up. But really, thank you, you guys are always the thing that cheers me up and makes me smile. **

**Well that's it… Review! **


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